


If I Tell You My Heart Has Been Opened Wide, If I Tell You I'm Frightened

by TheBritishAreComing (grilledcheeseandguavajelly)



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-03-21 20:27:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3704085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grilledcheeseandguavajelly/pseuds/TheBritishAreComing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She didn’t want to think it. She didn’t even want to let it enter her head because if it wasn’t true she couldn’t handle the heartbreak. Not again. So she pressed her hands to her face and tried desperately to go back to sleep, to drown out the clattering from that wonderful man in the other room. Tried to let the darkness fill her, carry her away, block out the noise of that nagging voice in her head. But it was still there. Pounding over and over. Repeating and repeating. And she couldn’t shake it.</p>
<p>	/This is how you felt when you had Salome./</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Write about a pregnancy
> 
> Title taken from "Bring Me To Light"
> 
> Okay, I know that Alex said she went perimenopausal right after she had Salome, but let's just pretend that didn't happen, yeah? :)
> 
> Disclaimer: I know nothing about the actual lives of these people. This is fiction. Pure fiction.
> 
> Bear with me, this is unbeta'd!
> 
> So I've had this tucked away for a while, but I decided to post it now because my cousin just found out she is pregnant and I thought it was fitting! :)
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!! xx

Alex picked mindlessly at her eggs, scooting them lazily around on the plate but careful not to let them touch her toast.

“Come on, love, you have to eat something,” Matt worried, his hands twitching restlessly on his fork.

Alex swallowed. “Sorry, sweetie. I guess I’m just not very hungry this morning.” She carefully stabbed at her eggs, lifting her fork to her mouth. She gagged as the food touched her tongue, but swallowed it down the best she could.

“Surprising,” Matt said, looking down at his plate in frustration as his eggs ran away from him. He finally caught one, scooping it into his mouth and chewing noisily. “After last night I figured you would have a big appetite, _Mrs. Smith_.” He winked at her, smacking loudly on his eggs.

Alex’s gaze caught on the half-chewed food in his open mouth and she gagged again, dropping her fork onto her plate and grabbing desperately at her toast instead. Toast was good. Toast would settle her stomach.

“Yes, darling. Last night was… quite the adventure.” She attempted a smirk as she put a small piece of the bread in her mouth, but it fell flat as her stomach churned. She looked up at Matt. “Excuse me. I’m sorry, I just… I think I’m going to be sick.”

Sliding out of her chair quickly, Alex barely made it down the hall and into the bathroom before her breakfast came back up, her stomach heaving as she leaned over the toilet. Her hands splayed out on the floor beside her knees, and just as a curl fell into her face, Matt was there, pulling her hair back into a loose ponytail and rubbing a hand over her back, cooing softly as she heaved again and again.

As suddenly as it had come, the nausea was gone, and Alex fell back into Matt, slouching against him. She wiped at her mouth as Matt’s hand pressed against her damp brow, stroked softly through her curls.

“If you didn’t like the breakfast, you could’ve just told me,” he teased, tugging on one of her curls.

Alex managed a soft hum, suddenly tired, and she could almost feel Matt’s frown behind her as he scooped her up in his arms and carried her back to their room. He laid her gently on the bed, pulling the sheets up and around her. Brushing her hair away from her face, he placed a soft, lingering kiss against her temple.

“Go to sleep, love,” he whispered.

Alex chuckled softly. “Not even going to ask me if I want to brush my teeth? How did I ever deserve you?”

“Go to sleep, Alex,” he urged, crawling onto the bed next to her. “You need your rest.”

“I feel fine, Matt. I don’t know what came over me. It must have been a dizzy spell or something. I promise, I’m fine.”

Moving to take the covers off, Alex flashed Matt what she thought was a reassuring smile, but Matt’s hand covered hers quickly, smoothing the sheets back down as he wrapped his arm around her.

“I’m sure you do, love, but I know for a fact that you didn’t get much sleep last night, so you’ve got to be tired. Just do as you’re told, Alex.”

“Only in the dark, darling,” she replied smoothly, and she heard him snort into the pillow behind her. She almost rolled over and curled into him, but soon her eyes were heavy and Matt’s arms wrapped further around her and she fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

When she woke, Matt was gone, and she could hear the faint sound of dishes clattering somewhere across the flat. Alex squinted her eyes against the darkness. Something was off. He never left her in bed alone. He would always wait. Always. Just to tell her how beautiful she looked while she slept, or to press small kisses against her jaw, or to hold her for a minute longer. No, she was always the first out of bed. _Always_.

Her mind siphoned through what sliver of a day she’d had before she had fallen asleep again, and it all came flooding back to her. Alex shut her eyes against the events of the morning and pulled the covers up over her head to block out her racing mind. She didn’t want to think it. She didn’t even want to let it enter her head because if it wasn’t true she couldn’t handle the heartbreak. Not again. So she pressed her hands to her face and tried desperately to go back to sleep, to drown out the clattering from that wonderful man in the other room. Tried to let the darkness fill her, carry her away, block out the noise of that nagging voice in her head. But it was still there. Pounding over and over. Repeating and repeating. And she couldn’t shake it.

_This is how you felt when you had Salome._

Alex threw the covers off, jumping out of the bed and yanking the door open. She clamped a hand over her mouth as she raced back down the hall, kneeling in front of the toilet as she heaved again. Barely anything came out, but her body still lurched and contracted as if she could throw up the contents of the entire world. Tears streamed down her face and she gasped for breath, barely registering the thundering footsteps until Matt was behind her again, holding her up and pulling the hair out of her face. She gagged and spluttered until she was dry heaving, Matt pulling her back against him and leaning them both up against the bathroom wall. He rubbed circles on her shoulders, one of his hands landing briefly on her stomach before she moaned and shoved him off, tilting her head in the opposite direction.

“Alex? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she choked out, her stomach still knotting in painful patterns.

“Alex, come on. We need to get you to a doctor.”

“No, darling, I’m fine.” She turned to face him slowly and gave him a weak smile. “Plus, I’ve got my Doctor. Right here.” Patting Matt’s cheek, Alex braced her hands on the floor and pushed herself up, Matt’s arms wrapping around her waist as he hauled her up.

“Alex, love, let’s go see Dr. Huffman.” He started pulling her out of the room, but Alex protested, pushing his arm away and squirming free of his grasp.

“I’m fine, sweetie. I feel fine now,” she lied, her stomach swirling and contracting.

She shook her head as an unnatural bout of fatigue settled in, and she started walking toward their bedroom again, Matt helping her up into their bed once more. She was fine. She just needed to think. Needed to breathe.

This time when he tried to climb in next to her, Alex froze.

“I-uh… I’m actually feeling a bit warm, sweetie. Would you mind maybe not laying in bed with me? Just this once? I… um…”

Alex pressed her lips together in an attempt to stop the tears pricking at the corners of her vision. This wasn’t fair to him. He hadn’t done anything wrong. And he was bound to think he had, because she had never turned him away. At least not like this. Sure, at the very beginning she had been reluctant to start dating him, but she had never flat out rejected him.

Matt’s brows pushed up in the most pathetic, adorable way, and she wanted to pull him to her, to apologize, but she couldn’t. She needed to be alone right now. To think this through.

“But Alex, I—“

“Please just go, darling,” she whispered, tears sticking in her throat.

Matt’s brows drew together. “No! You’re sick and I’m staying here with you. Deal with it.”

His words rang out loudly and split through Alex’s head as her fingers traced quick, nervous lines on her stomach. The room was spinning and she was so hot and she just wanted the covers off and Matt was there and he was grabbing for her and—

“Alex, let me—“

“Leave, Matthew!” she screamed.

Matt’s face crumpled instantly, his hands falling to his sides as he blinked hard in astonishment. Oh God, she wanted to die, wanted to push her face into the pillows until she couldn’t breathe. She almost apologized, but he was already getting off the bed.

“Okay,” he whispered, deflated, his fingers tracing down her arm as he placed a kiss to her forehead and turned slowly, closing the door softly behind him.

Alex flipped onto her back and let out a deep sigh as hot tears fell down her face. God, she was a terrible person. But she needed to be alone.

Alex ran her hands lightly over her stomach again as she thought back on the last month. Parties, late nights chatting with Salome, press, quiet dinners at home with Matt, not so quiet nights after the dinners. And yes, she remembered fondly, those seven days when Matt had barely been able to restrain himself. What day had that achingly long week started? The tenth? Fourteenth? Something in the back of her head was telling her it was the second, but she knew that couldn’t be right.

She threw her hand blindly over to the bedside table, grabbing for her mobile. Swiping a finger impatiently over the screen, she opened up her calendar and scrolled through the last month. “Okay,” she breathed, her heart pounding in her throat. It _had_ been the second. The little nagging voice in her head had been right. And that was fine, because what day was it now? She scrolled back through until she found the day highlighted in red.

Alex’s mouth dropped open as her phone slid out of her hand, falling onto the bed with a thud.

_Shit_.

It was the tenth. Her breath hitched in her throat before she quickly covered her mouth with her hand, forcing herself to breath out through her nose. It was okay. Everything was going to be okay, because she was probably just late— even though she had never been even a day late in her entire life, had it scheduled almost down to the minute. Eight days. Eight days late.

_Breathe. Just breathe, Alex_.

Her hands settled on her abdomen protectively as she blinked away tears. _A baby_. A laughed bubbled up and out of her throat as warm tears pooled in the corners of her eyes and fell onto the pillow. She would get to be a mother again. And Sal would have a little brother or sister.

Her breaths quickened as her laughs turned to sniffles, and she wiped at her eyes sloppily as she kicked the covers off of her. She had to tell Matt. He would be so—

Alex froze.

So _what_?

She had told him that she couldn’t have children, that Salome was all they would get. Maybe he wouldn’t want kids. Maybe he liked their life how it was, Sal only coming over for a couple weeks every month or so, having time to themselves. Sure, Alex called her daughter at least once a day, but Matt was usually at work. When he was home he always insisted Alex put her on speakerphone, but… She had never doubted that Matt loved Sal, and Sal loved Matt, but would he want a child of his own? A _baby_? Oh God, no, he wasn’t ready to handle a baby. Certainly wasn’t mature enough. He was a child himself. She hadn’t had Salome until she was far older than he was now, and as much as she had wanted a child before Salome, she honestly didn’t think she would have been ready for it. Raising a human being was hard work, not for the feint of heart.

Alex swallowed thickly, her face hardening in determination. No, she wouldn’t tell him until she was absolutely positive. She didn’t want to scare him if she had just counted her days wrong, marked her calendar a week early by mistake. She knew - she _knew_ \- that she hadn’t, but she told herself that she had, if only to put off the inevitable disgust on Matt’s face, to keep another man from walking out on her.

Alex swung her legs over the edge of the bed, sitting up and clenching her fingers around the sheets. _You’re wrong, Alex. This couldn’t just_ happen _. Not after all of the work it took last time. You’re wrong._

She took a deep breath and stood, reaching over and pulling the door open quietly. She heard the telly droning softly and walked determinately down the hallway. She had a plan. And she _would_ get him out of the house. Turning the corner, Alex scanned the room for Matt.

He was dozing on the couch, and a wave of guilt washed over her because she had told him to get out of his own bedroom. Instantly her mind flashed back to that awful night with Flo - him yelling at her, slamming the bedroom door and waking Salome. Sal’s wails as Alex had picked her up and bounced her lightly for three hours, placing her gently back in the cot when she had finally fallen asleep before heading wearily to the kitchen to get a glass of water. Flo’s arm hanging over the side of the couch just as Matt’s was now, an almost identical blanket thrown over his shoulders. Alex had tucked him in and he had swatted her arm away in his sleep. He had come back to bed the next day. But after that night he had slept on the couch at least once a week, until he didn’t sleep with her at all, until he didn’t live with her at all.

Alex shook her head. Brushing Matt’s fringe away from his face and smoothing a hand over his brow, she held her breath as she waited for him to bat her hand away, for the cycle to start all over again. His eyes fluttered open and her chest constricted, but his gaze met hers and he smiled softly.

“Hey, sleepyhead…” he whispered, his hand catching hers and pulling it down to his lips.

“Morning,” she replied, smiling as enthusiastically as she could.

Matt sat up on the couch and patted the space beside him. “So you’re feeling better then?”

“A bit,” she replied, sitting next to him and curling into his side. “Actually, I was a bit hungry, so—“

“You want breakfast again?” he asked brightly, pushing away from her. “It’s nothing for me to make you more eggs, or toast, or waffles. Whatever you want.”

Alex smiled and laced her fingers with his, taking a deep breath. _Here goes_.

“Actually, darling, I was craving those little biscuits that you bought for me a few weeks ago? From across town? I know it’s a big favor to ask, but I’m still not feeling great and that’s really the only thing that sounds remotely appealing to me right no—“

Matt was off of the couch before she had finished. “Of course, love. Of course, whatever I can do to help.”

His words plowed through her and a new wave of guilt washed over her, but she pushed it away because she _needed_ to do this.

“It would really mean a lot, sweetie,” she replied, staring at her hands.

He smiled and placed a kiss to her temple before booping her on the nose, grabbing his keys off the small table by the door. “I’m already gone. Love you, Kingston.”

“Love you, too, darling.” She smiled forcefully until he was out the door, breathing a sigh of relief as she walked to the window and watched his car drive away. Alex rushed into the bedroom and fished out a pair of jeans and a shirt, pulling them on quickly before shoving her feet into her trainers. If her calculations were correct, she had approximately a half hour to get to the Tesco down the street and head back to their flat, take the test and decide what to tell Matt.

She snatched a water bottle from the refrigerator before grabbing for her keys and mobile and running out to her car. Alex slammed the door behind her, tearing out of the drive. Breaking open the water bottle, she chugged as much of it as she could while she drove. She knew what had to be done. And with her history, God help her, she needed a full bladder.

Alex sped aggressively down the street before parking and rushing into the Tesco, careful to keep her head down. She looked around frantically before turning down one of the closer aisles and scanning the shelves.

Alex stood on her toes as she reached for a small, rectangular box. Upon reading the back, though, that little nagging voice returned and she grabbed for three more boxes. Keeping her head down, she scurried over to a check out lane and handed the cashier a wad of cash, muttering a low “keep the change” before walking quickly out the doors and sliding back into her car. Alex dropped the boxes into the seat next to her and stared at them for a moment, catching her breath. Oh God, she was doing this. This was actually happening.

A sharp noise jerked her gaze back to the window, but after quickly checking her surroundings and thankfully finding no paparazzi, she forced the car into reverse and peeled out of the car park, speeding back to their flat.

* * *

Alex held up the small, purple and white stick, and waited. And waited.

It didn’t matter, because she would be happy either way. Of course she would. She already had Salome, who was just absolutely perfect. And she had Matt, who was incredibly amazing. She didn’t need another baby. She was happy with the life she lived. No, she wasn’t going to let this rip her apart like last time. She should be grateful with what she had. She had been blessed with one baby, and if she didn’t have another one then it obviously wasn’t meant to be.

Shaking her head, she squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed hard. She could do this. No matter the outcome, _she could do this._

Opening her eyes, Alex looked down at the small stick that held her future.

One line.

She had taken enough of these tests with Flo that she knew what it meant without even looking at the box. And it was okay. She was okay, because she didn’t need another baby. She had Salome, and that was enough for her.

So then why could she feel tears sliding down her cheeks?

Narrowing her eyes, she glared down at the stick and almost threw it in the bin, but froze when she saw the red line. The new red line. Sitting right next to the other red line.

Two lines.

Alex pushed her free hand over her mouth as a laugh bubbled up her throat. _Two lines._

Hands shaking, she balanced the stick on the sink and grabbed for the box, pulling the other stick out. She waited for what felt like an eternity, legs bouncing up and down.

Two lines.

Sniffing back her tears, Alex quickly reached over and pulled open the other boxes. She dumped out the sticks and grabbed them, one by one.

Two lines. Two. Again. Again and again. Again.

She was crying in earnest now, balancing each one on the sink in turn. A baby. They were going to have _a baby_. Joy surged up and out of her as she choked on sobs, heading over to the sink and carefully washing her trembling hands. She grabbed for a few tissues, dabbing and blotting at her eyes and cheeks, but the tears kept coming. She had never been this happy in her entire life. Sure she had been ecstatic to be pregnant with Salome, but that had happened so roughly, with so much frustration and loss, so many doctor’s appointments and arguments with Flo. This time it had happened on it’s own. She hadn’t even thought about the possibility, other than talking to Matt about having his own family. He had insisted he was content with Sal, and she had pushed, had told him that he should be with someone else. But Matt had replied that the didn’t want someone else, he wanted her. And honestly, she had been so happy that she had dropped it, afraid that if she brought it up again he would change his mind.

Alex couldn’t wait to tell him. To see the look on his face. He would be so happy.

Right?

He would, wouldn’t he?

She almost knocked the tiny purple sticks off of the sink as her hands jerked up to her cheeks.

Oh God, what if he didn’t want kids? What if he didn’t even want Salome? They had it pretty easy right now, able to go where they wanted, when they wanted. Except for when Sal was staying with them. Alex tried to think back to Matt’s face when she was around, his mannerisms, but she couldn’t remember. Smiles of course, but had she really been paying attention to him? No, of course not. Because Sal was there. What if she had missed his little grunts of frustration, or annoyance stoking behind his eyes. Sure he had always fallen into bed exhausted at the end of the day, but she thought it was because he was having fun. She had misread him. Oh God, she had totally misread him.

It all came flooding back to her, the way his arms hadn’t wrapped around her those nights, how he had drearily made her coffee in the mornings, scrubbing at his eyes and yawning rather than bouncing up and down and humming. How they had waited in silence for Sal to wake up, staring blankly at the telly instead of him babbling at her while she sipped tiredly at her coffee.

No, he wasn’t ready for this. He didn’t want this. He was young, needed to be free. She was already holding him back enough. He couldn’t deal with a baby. A baby changes your whole life. And to throw this at him when she had told him with utter confidence that it couldn’t happen, it almost felt like betrayal, like she was spitting in his face.

Alex bit down hard on her lip as her jaw quivered, her eyes dry with the shock of her realization. Swallowing, she decided that she wouldn’t tell him. Not today. No, she would wait as long as she could, a few months at least, because she couldn’t watch another man walk out on her.

She had stared at the back of Matt’s head enough on the set of Who, watching him talk to the director, watching him flail his arms and stumble across set while filming. She had studied the back of his head that first night, when he had rolled over onto his side in his sleep, his steady breaths almost mocking her short, rapid ones. She had brushed her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, and he had quickly flipped back around, eyes open and pupils blown as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her senseless.

She knew the back of his head almost better than the front of it, and she could just picture it walking out the front door, his hands pulling roughly through his hair as he sighed and slammed the door behind him.

No, she couldn’t tell him. She would figure something out, but she couldn’t tell him.

Alex heard the faint beep of Matt locking his car outside the window, and she hastily pushed off of the sink, wiping clumsily at her face before heading out into the living room.

They were going to have a baby. But he couldn’t know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is personally one of my favourite chapters, so I hope you all enjoy! :)
> 
> (This one is also unbeta'd)
> 
> I'm going to be out of town this weekend (seeing Alex and Karen *squee!*) So I won't be posting any more until sometime next week! 
> 
> I hope you all have a lovely weekend! xx

Alex sat in the plush yellow chair across from the couch, her fingers fidgeting restlessly over the pages of a book. She kept rereading the same sentence, her mind reeling. But then she heard the key turn in the lock and she bolted upright, slamming the book closed before hastily opening it again. Her fingers shook as she flipped through a few pages. _Just breathe._

The door opened and Matt walked in, dropping his keys on the table and pulling a paper bag through the door behind him.

“Hi, honey. I’m _home_.”

Alex looked up from her book, her fingers tracing over the corners as she attempted a smile and responded automatically.

“And _what_ sort of time do you call this?”

Matt laughed and headed into the kitchen, smiling at her over the counter. Alex laughed as well, but it sounded hollow, even to her own ears. Matt gave her a concerned look, and she ducked her head down into the book again. She had only gotten three sentences into the page before she saw Matt’s shoes under the bottom of her book and heard a plate sliding down onto the small table next to her. She lowered the book and folded it in her lap.

Looking over to the side table, she saw that not only had Matt bought her the biscuits, but he had brought her some cheese and a banana as well.

“I, um, asked the shop owner what was good for an upset stomach, and he told me that bananas usually settled well, but I thought that bananas and biscuits were a bit boring, so I thought maybe you would like some cheese, but I figured if you didn’t want it I could eat it, and it’s fresh, because I got it from the deli, and they cut it for me right there so don’t worry about it being all processed and—“

“It’s lovely, Matt. Thank you.” Alex smiled weakly and picked up a biscuit. Popping it into her mouth, she waited for it to dissolve and almost melted into the taste before she gagged. Eyes wide, she peeled it off of her tongue. “Oh my go-, ugh, no.” She placed it back down on the plate, swallowing hard and looking up at Matt.

His brows were drawn together, hands fidgeting restlessly at his sides.

“Are those the wrong ones? I thought they were the same but maybe I was wrong. I’m sorry, Alex. I’ll go back, I’ll—“

She put her hand up to stop him. “No, darling, you’re fine. These are the right ones. I just… I seem to have lost my appetite.”

His frown deepened for a split second before his face lit up. “Wait! I almost forgot, I got you something else, too!” He turned and barely hit his knee on the couch before sliding around it and back into the kitchen.

“I’m sorry, Matt,” Alex called, her fingers picking at the hem of her shirt as she stared into her lap. “I don’t know what I was thinking. And you went all the way over there… I just, I’m so sorry…”

“It’s fine, love,” Matt replied over his loud clattering. “But I still think you should go see a doctor.”

Matt rounded the counter and headed back to her, a bright teacup held carefully in his hands. He walked slowly, angling the cup ever so slightly to keep its contents from spilling over.

“I don’t need a doctor, darling. I’m fine.”

“Alex, come on. Don't do this. You’re sick, you need to see Dr. Huffman.”

“No, I don’t, Matt. I am perfectly fine.” Her voice hardened just a bit, daring him to argue. And of course, he did.

“Yes. You do. Alex I just watched you throw up twice and you’ve completely lost your appetite. That’s not good. You’re sick. And so after you finish this I’m taking you to the doctor’s.” He held up the tea and nodded at it. “It’s peppermint. To settle your stomach.”

Alex barely heard him, though, because _oh_ , he was not talking to her like that. She wasn’t a child. She was older than him for God’s sake.

“I don’t need a doctor, Matthew!” She forced, her hands gripping the sides of her chair.

His brows pulled together. “Why do you always argue with me, Alex?”

“Oh, I _always_ argue with you, do I? So I argued with you about buying that waffle maker you never use? Or about those ridiculous socks that you insisted on wearing to the premier? Or about those bloody bathmats that are supposed to absorb the water off of your feet and have done nothing but make a huge puddle on the floor of the bathroom every time you shower? I argued about all of that?”

“Well, no. But you argue when it comes to your health. And those bathmats are cool. And totally work!”

Alex sat up in the chair. “No, Matthew, they don’t! They don’t work! I don’t know what delusions you’re under, but nothing that you buy off the telly _ever_ works!”

“Oh, so the retractable hose I bought doesn’t work? Because last time I checked it was watering your flowers _just fine_ ,” he growled.

Alex’s eyes narrowed. “Now who’s arguing?!”

“Because if I didn’t you wouldn’t take care of yourself!”

“I’m fine, Matthew!”

“Stop it!” he yelled, a bit of tea spilling over the top of the cup. “Stop saying you’re fine! You’re not fine, Alex! And so help me, if there is something seriously wrong with you and you don’t go to the doctor, I—“

Alex pushed herself up out of the chair. “There is nothing wrong with me!”

“You don’t know that!”

“Yes, I do!”

“How?! You haven’t even been to the doctor! If something happens to you I will not be able to live with myself!”

“For God’s sake!” she screamed, tugging her hands through her hair. “Nothing is going to happen to me! Stop treating me like a child! I can bloody well take care of myself!”

“No, you can’t, Alex!”

She threw her hands up in front of her, fingers stiff. “Yes, Matthew! Yes, I can! You seem to forget that I was alive for almost twenty years before you were even _born_. I don’t need you around, telling me what to do!”

He took a step back. “I’m not telling you what to do.”

“Yes, you are!” she argued exasperatedly.

Matt shook his head. “No, I’m just concerned about yo—“

“Well, don’t be! I told you I’m perfectly fine!”

“But you always say that, Alex!” he forced, hands tightening around the cup. “And you’re not fine! Every single time you have said that to me, you haven’t been fine!”

Alex rubbed at her forehead. “But this time I am.”

“But you aren’t!” Matt argued, one hand pulling through his hair while the other held the tea more firmly. “You forget that I live with you, Alex. I am your bloody _husband_. And I know you better than a lot of people know you. One thing I’ve learned through all of this is what it looks like when you’re fine. And this—” he gestured wildly with his hand, “—is not what it looks like! Now would you please just listen to me and go to the doctor’s?! I’ll drive you, I’ll stay with you the whole time—“

“NO!” Alex snapped. She caught herself and paused, but something in Matt’s eyes made her frustration grow and expand out through her. “No, I’m not going to the doctor’s, Matthew. Because there’s nothing wrong with me!”

Matt scoffed rudely. “That’s complete shit, Alex! I know you don’t feel well! Stop denying it!”

She shook her head. “I’m not! Just- Just stop treating me like a bloody five year old!”

He stepped towards her, concern flooding his features. “I have to or else you won’t take care of yourself!”

“I will, Matthew, I’m fine!”

“No, you aren’t!” he argued. “You literally just bloody told me that you don’t fell well!”

Alex shook her head again, fingers pinching at the bridge of her nose. “I don’t, but that’s not—“

“So we’re going to the doctor’s!”

She dropped her hand. “I don’t need a bloody doctor, Matthew!”

“Yes, you do! We need to figure out what’s wrong with you!”

Alex balled her hands into fists. “I don’t need to figure anything out! I don’t need a doctor!”

“Why?!” he screamed, his arm flailing. “Why don’t you need a doctor then, Alex?!”

“Because—“ Tears burned behind her eyes, and she blinked rapidly. “I just— I don’t need one, okay?!”

“Why the _fuck_ not?!”

“Because I’m pregnant!”

Alex clamped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide.

For a excruciatingly long moment there was a skull-splitting, deafening hush. Alex’s eyes moved restlessly, landing anywhere but Matt’s face as her heart pounded loudly in her ears. But then she sniffed, fracturing the silence, and forced herself to meet Matt’s gaze.

Instantly, time slowed, and Alex watched as Matt’s hands went limp and the teacup fell out of them, dropping weightlessly onto the the floor before shattering into a million pieces. The hot liquid spilled out of it and soaked through the plush rug as a strong scent of peppermint wafted out and burned into Alex’s nose. She swallowed, staring carefully into Matt’s wide eyes as her hands fiddled restlessly with the hem of her shirt.

He blinked hard. “Y-You’re…”

“Pregnant. Yeah,” she replied softly, her hands smoothing down her stomach as she dropped his gaze and stared at her feet.

She heard him swallow roughly. “But y-you said th-that…”

“That I couldn’t… I know.” Her hands moved protectively over her abdomen as she closed her eyes, hot tears dripping down her face. “Matt, listen, I know we never… And, well, I didn’t think that I… So if you wanted to— To l-leave, I would understand. Just, maybe go now? So it’s easier for both of us? Because I don’t want—“

Alex cut off as two perfect arms wrapped around her waist. She opened her eyes, Matt’s shocked expression staring back at her. He didn’t seem to know how he had walked over to her, as astounded at his arms as she was.

“You’re sure, though?” he asked slowly, hesitantly. “Y-You’re definitely…?”

Alex couldn’t help herself. She smiled. “Yes. Yes, darling I’m sure. And if you don’t believe me there are eight positive pregnancy tests sitting on the sink in the bathr—“

She didn’t get a chance to finish because suddenly Matt’s mouth was on hers, gentle and sweet and absolutely, completely filled with love. Alex’s eyes fluttered shut and she sighed, her hands moving up over his shoulders and around his neck. He tightened his hold on her waist, pulling her closer, and she melted into him, grinning. Peppering small kisses across her cheeks and down her jaw, Matt paused at her collarbone before pulling back and kneeling carefully on the floor in front of her. His fingers fidgeted as he moved his hands to her stomach, stopping just before he touched her. Looking up into her face with wide eyes, he whispered, “Th-There’s a little person in there?”

Alex beamed, laughing as tears fell onto her cheeks. “Yes, darling. There’s a little person in there.”

Matt quickly but gently pressed his ear to her stomach.

“Matt, sweetie, you can’t hear it—“

“Shhh, Kingston,” he interrupted, “I think I felt it kick!”

“It doesn’t work like that, darling,” she chuckled, reaching for his arms to pull him up again. He batted her away. Grabbing her hips, he turned his head to place one soft lingering kiss to the middle of her stomach, his fingers moving to trace over it reverently.

Matt looked up at her, eyes sparking. “We’re going to have a baby…”

Alex bit her lip, nodding as tears flooded her vision again. “Yes. Yes, darling, we are.”

Matt laughed brightly. “We’re going to have a baby!” He smacked his lips against her stomach, rising to his feet and wrapping his arms around her waist. Lifting her off the ground, he spun her around quickly before dropping her smoothly back onto the floor. Matt’s hands moved from her waist to her shoulders as he shook her a bit.

“A baby, Kingston!”

Alex laughed lightly as she cupped his face in her hand, brushing her thumb over his cheek. “Yes, darling. A baby. _Our_ baby.”

“Well, I don’t really know how much _I_ did,” he mumbled.

“About half, I would say,” Alex teased, a shiver running up her spine as his hand came up to cover her own on his face.

Matt chuckled softly, his thumb ghosting over her knuckles as he held her gaze. “God, Alex. You are stunningly gorgeous.”

Alex’s smile flickered.  

“Are you happy, though?” she asked hesitantly, pulling her hand away. “Because if this is too much for you, I would understand. I know I told you that I, you know… _couldn’t_. But… So, if you’re upset I completely get it—”

“Alexandra Elizabeth Kingston,” Matt cut in, pulling a finger through one of her curls and tucking it behind her ear. “I can honestly say that I have never been happier about anything in my entire life.”

Alex sniffed and swallowed around the lump in her throat. “Really?”

“ _Really_ really.”

Alex beamed, joy and excitement bursting somewhere in her core and flooding through her veins because this was happening. They were having a baby. And they were going to do it _together_.

“Oh, Matt, I—“

“Shhh…” Matt nudged his nose against her ear, and she heard him inhale deeply. Sighing, she nuzzled her cheek against his, and he leaned into her a bit before pulling back. Wiping a tear from where it had fallen on her cheek, he stared at her intently, and she saw something flicker in his eyes that she hadn’t seen in a long time. Since their first date, in fact. 

“You’re scared…” Alex murmured under her breath, not realizing she had spoken aloud until she saw him nod slowly. Smiling softly, she tracked a finger down his jawline. “Me too,” she whispered, and she watched tears pool in the bottom of Matt’s eyes.

Alex took a deep breath, and before she knew what was happening, her mouth was on his, desperation and excitement spilling out of her. Matt kissed her just as intensely, and Alex felt his hands on her hips as he walked her backwards. She didn’t register the wall behind her until he was pushing her against it, his hands wandering up and under her shirt, forceful and urgent. When he touched her stomach, though, his grip softened, fingers barely ghosting over her abdomen in small swirls.

“Matt, I—“ She whispered, swallowing hard as her hands pulled impatiently on his shirt, but then his fingers dove into her hair and dragged her closer to him, and she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. She pushed him off of her, gasping for air, and barely had time to take a shallow breath before his mouth was on hers again, his hands pulling at the hem of her shirt. She pressed her mouth eagerly to his once more, but pushed him away just as quickly.

“Matt, sweetie,” she gasped out, “I can’t breathe. I love you, but I can’t breathe.”

Gulping down air, Alex shoved a hand through her hair. “Lord only knows what I look like right now,” she muttered, but when she looked up into Matt’s face his eyes were dark and his hands were twitching at his sides.

“You’re perfect, Alex. You always look perfect.”

He started towards her, scooping her up in his arms as she wrapped her hands around his neck. He headed quickly down the hall, and she placed open-mouthed kisses to his neck as he carried her into the bedroom, setting her down gently on the bed. Her eyes fluttered shut as he smoothed the back of his hand against her cheek.

“You don’t have to be that delicate,” Alex breathed. “I’m not going to break.”

“Don’t wanna hurt the baby,” Matt growled, but then his mouth was on hers and he was pushing her down into the bed, hands wandering restlessly.

“You’re not gonna hurt the baby, Ma—“

She gasped and pushed her hands up into his hair, and he kissed her stomach gently before crushing his mouth down against hers and covering her body with his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! Your kudos and comments are greatly appreciated! xD


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! I've been absolutely slammed recently, but now everything has slowed down. Anyway! I feel like I should apologise in advance and I hope you all enjoy! Thank you for sticking with this during the long break! 
> 
> Again, un-beta'd (sorry)

Alex folded the pink blanket over the edge of the new, white cot. Smoothing it out, she frowned at a smudge on the railing and scrubbed at it with her thumb. She suddenly gasped and moved a hand over her growing stomach. She felt it again, a gentle thud from the inside, like someone had poked her. Alex looked up frantically and scanned the large room, but he wasn’t there. Right. He was making their lunch.

Alex pressed her hand harder over her bowling ball of a stomach and grinned down at it.

“Matt! Matt, come here!” she called loudly.

“Just a moment,” he called back, his voice distant. “I’ve just got to pour in the pasta and I’ll be right there—“

“Matthew, come here! Right now!” Alex laughed as she rubbed small circles over her abdomen, and gasped again, another, harder push coming from the inside.

She heard Matt’s frantic footsteps speeding down the hall, accompanied by several loud bangs and some choice words. He skidded around the doorframe and into the room, his eyes frenzied and his face painted with concern.

“What’s wrong? I’m here. I’m here, Ale—“ Matt cut off as Alex beamed at him, her hands continuously smoothing over her baby bump.

“Oh my God, Alex. Is the baby coming? Is this it? Oh my God, okay, here we go, Matt. You can do this. Think. Think, Matthew!”

Matt muttered to himself in frustration, hands pulling roughly through his hair as he scanned the room for Lord knows what.

“No, Matt, sweetie, calm down! The baby isn’t coming. Goodness, you still have another three months. Breathe, darling.” She chuckled lightly as relief flooded over his face.

“Oh, thank God.”

Alex gave him a very pointed look and he stumbled over his words as he tried to backtrack.

“No, not that kind of ‘thank God’, I just, it’s just that I don’t— I mean, we don’t have a bag packed, I still need to map out the exact route to the hospital, and I—“ He glanced up and Alex quirked an eyebrow at him. “Right, okay. Sorry. What was it that you needed?”

Alex grinned up at him, biting her lip. “She finally kicked, Matt. Just three times, but she finally kicked! I was starting to worry. Salome was kicking as soon as she had feet, and she didn’t stop until about a week before she decided to come out. But they’re two different people, I suppose. Come here, you’ve got to feel this.”

Alex ran a hand over her stomach again as she stared down at it, extending her other hand for Matt’s. She looked up after a long moment, though, and found him still standing at the other end of the room. She tilted her head to the side, brows drawing together.

“Matt, darling, what’s wrong?”

Matt gaped at her, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. “N-Nothing’s wrong… I just… She’s really in there. There’s really a baby in there…” His eyes were flooded with awe and fascination, and Alex chuckled.

“Of course there’s a baby in here. What’d you think? I just put on weight?”

Matt shook his head vigorously. “No, no, of course not! I mean, I knew there was a person inside of you, but… She moved. You felt her. It just makes everything so real… She’s really in there…”

Alex gave him a puzzled expression. “She’s been in here, Matthew. For a little over six months now. You remember all those mornings I threw up my breakfast? That was her. You know all of those little pictures we have posted on the fridge? That’s her.”

“Yeah… I suppose it is…” he muttered as his eyes bored a hole through her stomach. Alex stepped towards him, extending her hand once more.

“Come _here_ , darling.”

Matt walked over to her as if in a trance, stepping on stuffed bears and blankets without even noticing. Alex backed up as he walked toward her, moving to press her back up against the new cot. When he was near enough, though, she placed her hand in his, interlocking their fingers.

“Do you trust me?” She asked softly.

“Always,” he replied, his wide eyes meeting hers as he licked his lips.

Alex unlocked their fingers, wrapping her hand around his and pulling it to her stomach. She rested it right against the middle, covering his hand with her own and closing her eyes. A deep breath and a soft caress of her thumb over Matt’s hand, and then he started, yanking away.

“Something’s wrong! She’s not moving. Oh God, something’s happened to her!” Matt grabbed her large stomach with two hands, bending down and pressing his ear against it desperately. Alex gripped his arms and pulled his face up to hers gently, kissing him softly.

“You have to be patient, darling,” she chuckled, grabbing his hand between both of hers and placing it on her stomach again, holding it there as she pushed her lips against his more forcefully. Matt’s free hand twisted into her curls and pulled her closer. Alex smoothed her hands over his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck. Her fingers were just pushing up into his hair when she gasped again, pulling back and staring at her stomach.

“Was that…?” Matt breathed.

“Yeah,” Alex whispered, laughing lightly. “Yeah, that was her.” She looked up into Matt’s face, but he was staring at her stomach, eyes glittering. He looked down at her baby bump for a second longer before meeting her gaze, his mouth hanging open.

“Oh my God,” he mouthed, beaming as his other hand pressed against her stomach as well. Alex’s hands rested on the outside of his, and they both gasped as the baby nudged against them. Hard.

“What does it feel like?” Matt asked, his eyes locked on their hands.

“Um… weird,” Alex said, screwing up her face as she searched for an accurate description. “Kind of like someone is poking me from the inside…? But a bit like something tumbling around in there. Like a dryer.” Alex chuckled at her own comparison, bringing a hand to her forehead. “It sounds stupid, I know. But honestly—“

“No,” Matt cut in, looking up and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “It sounds brilliant. Just as long as it doesn’t hurt.”

Alex pushed the fringe out of his eyes. “No, sweetie. It doesn’t hurt.”

Matt knelt down in front of Alex, smoothing his hands along her bulging stomach and placing soft kisses there.

“It’s like a little alien inside of you, Kingston….”

Alex combed her fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his face as she hummed at his touch. “I suppose it is, sweetie. Like father like daughter.”

Matt pushed his chin up at her, a mock look of offense playing across his face. “Oi! Don’t act like you aren’t half alien yourself. If she’s comes out extra-terrestrial, I expect you to take some of the blame.”

“Not after carrying her around for nine months, I won’t. She’s already starting to lean on my bladder.” Alex frowned down at her stomach as she rested her arms behind her on the cot. “Not appreciated. I can only imagine what it’ll be like at seven and a half, eight months.”

Matt’s face lit up as he stood, taking her hands in his. “Well, love, how about you come sit down in the kitchen and rest, and I’ll finish making our lunch.”

He pulled her out of the room, careful now to step around all of the baby’s future toys. Alex sat at the kitchen table, having to push her chair out further than normal to compensate for her large stomach. She folded her hands on top of her baby bump, closing her eyes as she waited for food. Oh gosh, she was starving. It was a miracle she hadn’t gained an obscene amount of weight.

“Sorry I scared you, darling,” she called to Matt, but then she felt his hands on her stomach, his face in her hair. Alex hummed, keeping her eyes shut as Matt’s mouth met hers, her hand reaching up to cup his face. When he pulled back, Alex heard a plate sliding onto the table in front of her and her eyes flew open.

“It’s okay, love. It was just a shock.”

“A good shock?”

Matt smiled and kissed her temple. “Definitely a good shock.”

The entire time they ate, Matt’s hand rested on Alex’s abdomen, tracing small swirls and circles out over her shirt. The baby kicked a few more times, and Alex had to adjust herself in the chair each time she felt that push from the inside.

“Matt… I was thinking…” Alex started as Matt cleared the dishes from the table, shifting once again.

“What’s that, love?” She turned in the chair to face him as best she could. “Well, I was just thinking that maybe pink isn’t the best color for her room. It seems a bit cliché, doesn’t it? And what if the doctor was wrong? What if we have a boy? I feel like we should go with something more gender neutral… like yellow, or… beige?”

She heard Matt sigh as he walked back over to her.

“Alex, love,” he said slowly. “I’ve already repainted that room four times this week. First pink, then yellow, then a different shade of yellow, then pink again. I’m not painting it yellow again.”

“But it needs to be yellow, Matt,” Alex forced as she narrowed her eyes.

“But next week you’ll want to change it back to pink. We have plenty of time. How about you wait, let it sit, and if you still want it to be yellow, I’ll repaint it tomorrow, okay?”

Alex sighed. “Okay.”

“Alright!” Matt exclaimed, rubbing Alex’s shoulders quickly before turning back into the kitchen.

“But only,” Alex called out, “if you take all of those boxes I packed up yesterday to my mum’s like you said you would. Today.”

Alex heard Matt start to protest, and she raised her voice again. “You either take the boxes or paint the room. It’s your choice.”

Matt’s hands were suddenly on her shoulders, smoothing down her arms.

“Okay, love,” he sighed as he rested his chin in her hair. “Okay, you win. I’ll take the boxes. But I get a kiss first, and a thank you for lunch.”

Alex turned her head and raised her eyebrows at him, but he was giving her those adorable puppy dog eyes that she just couldn’t resist, so she stood slowly, pushing herself up off the arms of her chair with a grunt. Matt’s hand was under her arm instantly, pulling her up and tugging her against him. His other hand came to rest on her stomach as she stood on her toes and pressed a kiss to his mouth.

“Thank you for lunch,” Alex teased, smirking and patting his chest.

“That’s all I wanted,” Matt replied, kissing her forehead and pulling away. “So just those five boxes in the spare room, then?”

Alex nodded before gasping sharply and crying out, her hand flying to her stomach as her smile melted into a frown.

_What the—?_

Matt’s hands were on her in an instant, flying over her shoulders, down her arms, over her stomach.

“Alex, love, what’s wrong?”

Alex shook her head, the pain gone as quickly as it had come. She swallowed hard.

“Nothing. She just hit me pretty hard that time. Sal never did that.”

“Are you okay, though,” Matt worried, his tone heavy.

Alex braced herself for another sharp pain, but it didn’t come. After a moment’s hesitation, she nodded.

“Yeah, I think I’m alright.” She tried for a smile, but it fell flat.

“No. No, I’m not leaving now. I need to stay here with you. Here, Alex. You need to lay down.” Matt placed a hand on her lower back and nudged her gently down the hall toward their bedroom. Alex was already halfway in bed when she spoke.

“I’ll only lay down,” she grunted, sitting slowly on the bed, “if you promise to take the boxes to my parent’s house.” Alex scooted back and pulled her feet up onto the bed, rubbing a hand gently over her stomach and dropping her head back onto the pillow.

Something wasn’t right, but she couldn’t put her finger on it. That last kick shouldn’t have hurt that much, not after the first couple had been so late.

_Calm down, Alex. Everything is fine._

She shouldn’t panic. Nothing was going to happen. The baby was fine, she was fine, everything was _fine_. The baby was just kicking now. Just like Salome had. Babies kick. They move. They’re alive. This was all perfectly normal.

“…and stay here with you.” Matt stopped, looking at Alex expectantly. She had missed what he’d said, but she got the idea.

“No, Matt. I want you to take the boxes. It would honestly make me feel a lot better. I just… The whole house feels wrong. I don’t want the baby coming home to a mess.” She closed her eyes and shifted in the bed, suddenly extremely uncomfortable.

“Alex,” Matt said carefully, “the baby isn’t coming home for a couple of months.”

Alex’s eyes flew open and she shook her head. “Right. Sorry. I don’t know why I said that.”

Matt stared at her, his brows pushing together.

“Go, Matt. I’m alright. I promise.”

He wrapped her in his arms, pressing his face into her neck and holding tightly for a long moment before releasing her.

“I don’t like this, Alex, but I’ll go. Just because I don’t want to get you all worked up. But you promise me that you’ll stay in bed until I get back. Promise, Alex.”

Alex nodded sleepily, her hand brushing against his cheek. “Love you, darling.”

“I love you too, Kingston. Now get some sleep.” Matt smiled and twirled a finger into one of her curls before tucking it behind her ear. Placing a kiss to her forehead, his other hand came down to rest on her stomach and patted it lightly. Alex’s eyes grew heavy, and she felt the baby tumble around a few times as Matt turned and walked through the doorway. He blew her a kiss before shutting the door quietly behind him. Alex’s hands smoothed over her stomach and she closed her eyes, allowing exhaustion to engulf her and pull her into sleep.

 

* * *

 

Alex was woken by a soft movement on the bed, and opened her eyes to Matt crawling under the sheets. She stared at him as he moved, hair falling into his eyes and shoulders slouched. When he rolled over to wrap her in his arms, she put her hand out, scraping her throat.

“Matt, why are you coming to bed?”

“You fell asleep, love,” he replied tiredly. “It’s nearly three in the morning. I just got back from your parent’s house.”

Alex hummed, her hand coming up to rest on her stomach. “How are they?”

Matt let out a slow breath. “They’re good. You’re mum and I were talking for quite a while before I left. She wanted to know about the baby. I told her that she finally kicked.”

Alex smiled and traced her hand up Matt’s arm, scooting closer to him and resting her head on his pillow. Her baby bump pushed up against his abdomen, and she could feel the rise and fall of his stomach against hers.

“Shhh, Alex. You and the baby need rest.”

Matt kissed her forehead and folded her in his arms, and soon Alex’s breathing slowed and she fell back asleep.

 

* * *

 

A sharp, intense fire lashed out through Alex’s lower abdomen, and her eyes flew open. She pushed herself up on her forearms, gasping for air as the pain faded out and returned twofold.

“M-Matt,” she choked out, her hands flying to her stomach as the pain seared out into her feet and pulsed through her head. For a moment, Alex was paralyzed, squeezing her eyes shut and clenching her hands into fists. But then the pain was gone again and Alex rolled clumsily over onto her side. She shoved at Matt’s still sleeping form, her hands catching on his shirt and twisting into the fabric when the pain throbbed out into her toes again and tore her hips apart. 

“M-Matt. Matt, darling, wa-ake up.”

Matt’s eyes flew open and he hurriedly shoved himself up onto his elbows, a hand squeezing her arm.

“Alex? Alex, what’s wrong? Alex, talk to me—“

Alex cried out, the pain splitting through her head as flames licked at her pelvis. She jackknifed in on herself, hands clutching and grabbing at her stomach. It was so hot, and she couldn’t breathe.

_Oh God, the baby._

“M-Matt!” Alex gasped, hands pulling roughly at the sheets as she bit down on her lip. “Matt, something’s wrong. I—“ She cried out again, and suddenly felt something wet between her legs. Her eyes went wide and she froze.

“Alex, what is it? Tell me what’s wrong.” Matt had pushed himself up and was sitting now, his hand clumsily brushing the hair off of her damp brow. “Alex, love, I need you to talk to me.”

“I…” she whispered, eyes wide. “Matt, I think my water just broke.”

Suddenly the sharp pain surged through her again, and Matt was scrambling out of bed, running to her side, pulling the sheets roughly off of her.

“Matt, something— Something’s wrong. I’m so hot. Oh God, it hurts, Ma-att—“

She curled in on herself again, but Matt was wrapping his arms around her, pulling her out of bed.

“No, Matt, stop! It hurts! _Shit_ , Matt, stop it!” Alex pushed against him, trying to curl in on herself, trying to grab at her stomach, but then her arms were around Matt’s neck and she was sobbing into his shoulder because God, it hurt so bad. Like someone was slicing through her stomach with a blade of fire. Like someone was stabbing her over and over and over—

Matt gasped loudly and then he was gripping her tighter, practically running out of the room and down the hall.

“What’s wrong? Matt, what is it?!”

He was breathing heavily, and Alex heard him muttering, “It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay, Alex. It’s going to be okay.”

Matt grabbed at his keys as he hurried out the door, Alex’s feet hitting against the doorframe as they turned the corner. Alex pushed her face farther into Matt’s neck, and then he was putting her down, setting her carefully into the passenger seat of his car.

“Matt, no, don’t put me down! Don’t leave me, Matt!” Alex cried out as Matt shut the door quickly, rounding the car. No sooner had he left than the driver’s side door opened and Matt was sliding down into the seat. He sped out of the drive, veering onto the motorway and heading into town.

“M-Matt—“ Alex gasped, hitting her head against the back of the seat and gripping the armrests. She looked over at him and saw one of his arms smeared in red. “Matt… Wh-What’s on your arm?” Tears streaked down her face as she clutched at her stomach, curling in on herself.

“Nothing, Alex. I-It’s fine. You’re going to be fine. Let’s practice our breathing. Do it with me. In. Out. In. Out. Here we go.” Matt loudly demonstrated different breathing techniques, but Alex wasn’t listening, was having trouble focusing on anything but the mind-numbing pain splitting through her every nerve. Oh, God, the baby. This was wrong. This was all so wrong.

“Matt, this isn’t right. Th-The baby,” she gasped, “I-It’s too soon, Matt—“ Alex choked on a sob and pulled at her shirt, tugging it away from her bulging midsection. “M-Matt…”

Matt reached over and grabbed one of her hands, pulling it to his lips before squeezing it and holding it firmly in his lap.

“You’ll be fine, love. I promise, you’re going to be fine. Just stay with me.”

“But the baby, Matt. Sh-She’s too early—“

“No, Alex,” he cut in sharply. “No. She’ll be fine, but I need you to try to hold on for me. You need to make sure she doesn’t come too soon, okay? Can you do that for me, Alex?”

“Oh God, Matt, it hu-urts—” The pains were coming and going rapidly, hitting her like a gunshot and leaving her breathless when they stopped, then starting back up again before she even had a chance to inhale. This wasn’t right. It was _not_ like this with Salome.

Alex squeezed Matt’s hand and looked out the window, her back arching as her head banged against the headrest.

“Wait, M-Matt… No, this is the wrong hospital! No, Matt, y-you’re going the wrong way, this isn’t where I wanted her to be born. The other one is closer to my parents, Matt—“

“And also farther away. No, Alex. I’m sorry, but this one is closer.”

He sped into A&E and yanked the car into park, rounding to Alex’s side and pulling her out carefully. She clutched at his neck, his shirt, and sobbed into his shoulder because oh God, this was excruciating. The pain split through her skull and made her vision go dark around the edges, made her feet go numb. Her head bounced against Matt’s shoulder as he ran through the automatic doors and she heard someone yell “Help, please help us!” from miles away before she suddenly felt lightheaded and the world went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading and being so wonderful!! Kudos are greatly appreciated and your comments absolutely make my day! xx


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a little under a year (I am so sorry) I'm finally posting the rest of the story. And bugger posting one chapter a week or so on because I'll never get the whole thing posted, and while it may not seem like it, I've been itching to finish this one. So, without further ado, here we go. xx
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is a /story/. I made it up. It is fiction. 
> 
> Alright, let's do this.

“Alex?”

Matt shook the limp form in his arms lightly, staring intently at her face. Her perfect, beautiful, sweat-dampened face.

“Alex!”

Matt opened his mouth to yell for a nurse again, but then Alex was being taken out of his arms, placed on a gurney and laid out flat by a small group of people in scrubs. Matt’s hands flew over her shoulders, her hair, her stomach. He looked down and saw the blood already pooling on the white fabric, the color draining out of Alex’s face. And then someone was pulling him backwards, pushing him away from her as she was wheeled through thick steel double doors.

“Alex!” he called, rushing after her, pushing off the man restraining him and sliding through the doors after her. Matt was reaching for Alex, arms outstretched, when another man plowed into him.

He grunted as the man pushed him backward. Matt’s feet slipped and slid on the tile, his hands pushing off of the nurse’s shoulders, trying to propel himself up, over the hulking man.

“No!” he yelled, trying to break free. “No! Let me go! That’s my wife, let me GO!”

Matt shoved his hand against the man’s stomach, knocking him off balance. Scrambling around him, Matt started to sprint down the hall, but was yanked back, the nurse’s hand gripped tightly around his arm.

“Alex!” he screamed as he was whipped backwards, watching the gurney disappear behind another door. Then the nurse’s arms were wrapping around Matt’s abdomen and pulling him out through the steel doors. Once they had clicked shut, the nurse let go and Matt rushed the doors, pushing against them.  “That’s my wife! Let me in there, that’s my wife!” He shoved and kicked at the doors before dropping his head against them, his heart pounding frantically.

“Th-That’s my wife…” Matt murmured, tears flooding the bottom of his vision. He stood there for a moment, staring at the pristine hallway through the small glass window in the door. He pushed his hand against the glass, his fingers sliding against it’s smooth surface as he pressed his forehead to the cool steel.

“That’s my wife…” His voice broke on the last word and he closed his eyes as a single tear fell onto his cheek.

 

* * *

 

“Matt, where is she?”

Matt’s head whipped around and he stopped pacing, hand shoved halfway through his hair. Alex’s father stood across the waiting room, Alex’s mother pushed behind him protectively. He clasped her hand tightly, and after a moment Matt realized there were tears in her eyes.

“Mr. Kingston,” Matt said slowly, walking over to him as tears pricked threateningly behind his own eyes. “I don’t know what happened. She woke me up and I thought maybe the baby was coming, but there was blood. There was so much blood—“ Matt cut off as Alex’s mother clamped a hand over her mouth and made a small whimpering sound. 

“She’ll be okay, Maggie,” Alex’s father soothed as he wrapped an arm protectively around her.

“But Anthony,” she replied, her face contorting as tears fell on her cheeks. “Susie…” the word came out as a broken whisper, and Anthony helped her over to a chair. Matt, temporarily shaken out of his stupor, walked over quickly and helped her sit down. Anthony rubbed Margarethe’s back for a moment before looking up at Matt and speaking in a low voice.

“Maybe we should talk about this somewhere else.”

Matt nodded as Anthony placed a kiss on Margarethe’s forehead and squeezed her arm. The two men walked over to the corner of the waiting room, Matt wringing his hands.

“So she woke you up and there was blood and then what?”

Matt stumbled to get words out at first, but when he finally managed to push sound out of his mouth, everything came tumbling out.

“I- I picked her up and put her in the car because she was in s-so much pain. And I drove her over here as fast as I could, and I know it’s not the hospital we talked about, but I panicked and this one was closer and I got her out of the car and carried her inside because she couldn’t even s-stand up and then they put her on a stretcher and they took her in the back, but t-they said I couldn’t go back there with her and I don’t know what’s happening and I tried to ask them, because th-that’s my wife, and my baby, a-and they said that I have to stay here. Th-they said I have to stay here.”

Matt hit his fist against the wall and tugged a hand through his hair, tears welling in his eyes. He stared at the floor for a long moment before a large hand came to rest on his shoulder. Matt looked up to find Anthony smiling in reassurance.

“She’ll be okay, Matt. They know what they’re doing. I’m sure she’s fine.”

“But the baby…” Matt murmured, scrubbing a hand over his face. When Anthony didn’t respond, Matt dropped his hand and stared. He saw the concern flooding Anthony’s eyes and his heart thundered in his chest. “Mr. Kingston, is this…” He put his hands out placatingly, not knowing how to ask politely. Glancing hesitantly at Margarethe across the room, the words fell out of his mouth. “Is this what happened with Susie?”

Matt flinched at his own words, instant guilt washing over him, but Anthony just shook his head. “No, it wasn’t. There was no bleeding, it was more an issue of the umbilical cord…” He trailed off and Matt stared at his hands, silently cursing his mouth for letting the words out.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” Fading out, he scrubbed a hand over his neck because he did mean it, but he hadn’t meant for it to come out.

“It’s okay, son. Margarethe was fine, Susie was… she’s fine. And perfect. We couldn’t be luckier parents.” Anthony nodded as he looked over at his wife. Matt saw the adoration there, the respect in his eyes. He hoped he looked at Alex that way, that she could see how much she truly meant to him with each passing glance. It might be too late now.

Matt felt a hand on his shoulder, and then he was being pushed back toward Margarethe. Anthony tried to sit him in a chair, but before his trousers had hit the seat he was standing back up, pushing off the armrests and pacing back and forth. His hands fidgeted and his feet twitched as he watched the nurse’s station.

They stayed like that for an hour, Matt pacing restlessly as Anthony sat by his wife, squeezing her hand tightly as he pressed kisses to her head. Matt constantly pulled his phone out of his pocket, swiping his finger across the screen and then locking it again, pushing it back into his trousers. He felt so useless, so pointless, a failure of a husband. He couldn’t do anything. Alex was in there and they were doing God knows what to her and he was standing in a waiting room. Waiting.

“Matt?” a voice called from behind him. Matt whipped around, eyes landing on the lanky figure in the doorway. He hadn’t realized he’d been holding his breath until he sighed it out.

“Darvill,” he breathed, rushing over to him. Arthur immediately grabbed him and pulled him into a hug. Matt squeezed him tightly, looking up to see Karen standing behind him, smiling softly. “Karen…”

Matt pushed Arthur gently, moving past him to embrace Karen. She rubbed her hands soothingly over his back. “How is she?” she asked, grabbing his shoulders and looking into his eyes.

“I-I don’t know,” Matt whispered, pushing a hand through his hair. “They wouldn’t l-let me…”

Shaking his head, Matt scuffed his toe against the floor and swallowed hard.

“Hey, mate. I’m sure she’s fine. And the baby. They’ll both be fine.” Arthur placed a hand on Matt’s back, trying to catch his gaze. Matt glanced back at Alex’s parents, both watching him intently. Karen followed Matt’s eyes and pushed past him quickly.

“Oh, Mrs. Kingston, Mr. Kingston. How are you?” Her voiced faded as she headed toward them, pulling them both into a strong hug. Matt turned back to Arthur.

“Thanks for coming,” he stated, looking up to find Arthur watching Karen. “I know you’re both only in town for a short time, but my parents aren’t… they’re in America with Laura, and I didn’t know who else to call…” Matt trailed off and Arthur didn’t reply. When Matt glanced in his direction he found Arthur’s gaze still fixed on Karen. He bumped his shoulder against Arthur’s. “So you two came together, then?”

Arthur looked over at him quickly. “What? Oh, yeah. Yeah, we’re um, feeling things out.”

“I’m sure you’re feeling out plenty of things,” Matt crooned, raising his eyebrows.

“Oh, shut up, mate,” Arthur mumbled, shoving at him. Matt stumbled and almost fell, suddenly weak from the long night.

“Sorry.” Arthur placed his hand on Matt’s back and gently led him over to Alex’s parents.

Arthur wrapped his arm around Karen’s shoulders protectively. “Mrs. Kingston, Mr. Kingston.” He placed his other hand on Matt’s shoulder, patting it as he looked over to Matt and smiled.

A small grin crept over Matt’s face and he felt a tiny bit of hope flutter in the base of his stomach. Everything would be fine. They were all here, together, and everything would be fine.

 

* * *


	5. Chapter 5

“Mr. Smith?”

The nurse looked around the waiting room as Matt shot up from his chair, his eyes glancing to Alex’s parents and then over to Arthur. Karen was under his arm, her hands fidgeting with Arthur’s fingers. She gave him a small nod and a smile, and Arthur nodded as well. 

Matt looked back over to the nurse as his feet moved across the room. His vision tunneled on the woman standing across from him.

“A-Alex?” he forced out, his mouth suddenly dry.

Matt saw something dark flash through the nurse’s eyes. She smiled politely, murmuring a faint, “Come with me”, but something in her face made Matt’s stomach churn. He glanced back at Arthur and saw a hard determination in his eyes. Arthur nodded once, just barely, and Matt turned on his heel to follow the nurse. 

His hands squirmed at his sides as he walked down long hallways, and he kept glancing warily at where the blood had been recently scrubbed off of his arm. He tried to speak, but his throat was clogged with fear. Something was wrong. Something had gone horribly wrong. 

They turned a corner and the nurse stopped in front of a door. Swallowing hard, Matt found his voice around his rapid breathing. “Is she okay? A-Are they okay?”

“She’s probably pretty out of it, she lost a lot of blood.” The woman pushed the handle on the door.

“Right, but the baby—“ Matt cut off as he peered through the small crack in the door, his eyes catching on Alex’s still form laying in a hospital bed. “—Alex.”

Matt rushed into the room, running to the bed and gripping his hands on the railing. 

“Alex?” he breathed, his fingers hovering over her face, her arms, her stoma—

He whipped around to the nurse lingering in the doorway. “The baby. What about the baby?”

She swallowed visibly and Matt’s heart sank, his hand automatically gripping Alex’s limp one. 

“No. NO. She’s fine. She was doing fine. She k-kicked,” Matt gasped out, tears welling in his eyes as he dropped his head. “No…” Anger flared in the base of his stomach and he kicked the bottom of the bed, hard, because this wasn’t fair. None of this was fair.

Alex shifted in the bed, her right hand squeezing his tightly as her left moved to cover her stomach.

Suddenly, her eyes flew open. 

“Matt…” she gasped, eyes wide. Alex swallowed as she looked down at her stomach, and Matt watched as her eyes grew heavy and her head fell back on the pillow.

“She’s on some light pain killers from the surgery,” the nurse said softly from the door, and Matt heard her quiet footsteps as she walked into the room. “Mr. Smith, about the baby..."

Matt held a hand up behind him, inhaling sharply as he stared intently at Alex’s face. He bit the inside of his cheek hard, chewing on it in an effort to cover the ache in his chest.

“But Mr. Smith, she’s alright.”

Matt’s head whipped up and he stared at Alex’s hand in his, blinking hard.

“W-Who?” he asked hesitantly, afraid he had misheard her.

“Your baby. She’s alright.”

Matt turned around, staring at the nurse. “She’s fine. You’re sure?” 

The nurse nodded and Matt swallowed roughly, squeezing Alex’s hand. 

“Take me to her.”

They walked down a long hallway before stopping in front of a large glass window. Matt peered in at the cots and cots of infants, some wrapped in pink, some wrapped in blue. His eyes scanned restlessly over the pink wrapped ones, never landing on any one in particular.

 

“Which one is she?” he asked hurriedly, his hands fiddling with the ledge beneath the window.

“You actually can’t see her from here,” the nurse replied, hesitantly resting a hand on Matt’s shoulder. “Because she was so premature, she’s in what we call NICU- Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. She’s behind those doors there.” The woman pointed at white doors in the back of the enclosed nursery.

“I thought you said she was fine,” Matt said, voice low in warning.

“I said she was doing alright,” the nurse corrected. “She was three months premature, so she’s not fully developed. But you don’t need to worry,” she amended when she met Matt’s frantic gaze. “We have a great staff here that are more than capable of taking amazing care of your daughter. Would you like to go see her?”

Matt hesitated, staring at the white doors. It felt wrong, seeing the baby for the first time without Alex. But he needed to go in. Oh, God, he needed to go in and make sure his little girl was okay.

Scrubbing a hand over his face, Matt sighed. “We need to go back and get Alex first.”

“Mr. Smith, she’s just been through a pretty tough surgery. She lost a lot of blood. She needs to rest.”

Matt met the woman’s gaze urgently, his hand pushing through his hair. “What exactly happened?”

The woman swallowed again, and the same dark expression passed over her face. “The baby came early, of course. And when Mrs. Smith’s water broke, she suffered what we call a ‘placental abruption’. It happens somewhat frequently in more… mature pregnancies like hers, when the amniotic fluid leaves the body too fast. Sometimes it causes the placenta to tear from the wall of the uterus. That’s what caused the bleeding. They did an emergency c-section and got the baby out safely, but the bigger problem arose when the placenta was removed. Mrs. Smith didn’t clot properly, so they had to perform an emergency… hysterectomy.” She paused, looking into the nursery, then rushed ahead. “They were able to stop the bleeding after that, but they had to do quite a severe blood replacement.”

Matt stood, motionless, her words sinking in and making him feel like he was drowning. He gaped at the floor, his fingers fiddling with the stitching on his pockets as he inhaled slowly. “So she doesn’t, she can’t…”

“Have any more children, no.”

Matt swallowed. It was one thing to think you couldn’t have kids, because of this reason or that. It was another to physically actually have that part of you removed. To have it permanently taken away from you. That gift of being able to carry a child, ripped from you without your consent. Oh, Alex.

He raised his eyes to the nurse, a weird sense of determination settling in his stomach. “Okay. Okay, that’s fine. But I want her with me when I see the baby.”

The nurse nodded and mumbled a soft “I’ll get a wheelchair” as Matt marched back down the hall. He walked into the room again, opening the door quietly and turning on the light. He found Alex awake, her hands smoothing repeatedly over her stomach. She sniffed softly and he saw tears dripping down her face.

“Oh, Alex,” he whispered, heart sinking into his stomach as he walked over and smoothed the hair out of her face.

“Matt,” she hiccuped, her hand twisting into his shirt. “Oh, Matt. The baby…” Alex’s voice broke on the last word and she cried out, a hand covering her mouth. Tears streamed down her face and she shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut.

“Shhh,” Matt soothed, stroking her hair. “Shhh, love. It’s okay. She’s okay.”

Alex’s eyes flew open and her breath hitched. “She’s okay?” 

Matt nodded encouragingly and Alex beamed, pushing herself up in the bed. “Oh, Matt, how is she? Is she perfect? Oh, what does she look like? Tell me everything, every little detail.”

At that moment, the nurse came into the room, pushing a wheelchair in front of her.

“Actually,” Matt said as he twisted a finger in one of Alex’s curls and tucked it behind her ear, “I haven’t seen her. I didn’t want to without you. So I forced this nice woman here to bring you a wheelchair. Do you think you can get up?”

Alex nodded vigorously and started pushing her feet off the bed before the nurse quickly walked over and helped her into the wheelchair. Matt gripped Alex’s hand tightly as they made their way down the hall, the nurse trying to explain everything to Alex as gently as she could.

“…so she’ll be in the intensive care unit for about two months, maybe less if she progresses well.”

Alex nodded bravely as she squeezed Matt’s hand. They stopped in front of the entrance to the nursery, the woman giving them both pale yellow paper smocks to put on over their clothing. Once Matt had clumsily tied his in the back and helped Alex into hers the best he could, the nurse opened the door and Matt wheeled Alex quickly through the nursery and into the intensive care unit. Matt didn’t know what he expected, but what he saw took him by surprise. 

There were only two babies in the unit, one in a pink hat and one in blue. Both were in a sort of incubator, a glass covered cot with multiple tubes stringing out to random places and numerous screens against a wall beeping out different rhythms.

Matt pushed Alex over to the baby in pink, and she leaned forward in the chair, her fingers pressing against the glass as she peered intently into the cot. Matt’s hands were on her shoulders, his head ducking around hers so he could see. His breath caught in his throat.

The little figure inside the cot was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. She was no bigger than his head, her small form disfigured by the oversized diaper wrapped around her. Her head was covered in a large pink hat, her eyes squeezed shut. She had Alex’s nose, tiny but wide at the end, and it was plugged with a small oxygen tube, taped to her cheeks on each side. Her little face was flushed, and Matt noticed the adorable way her eyebrows were pulled up. Just like her mother’s did when she was worried. He counted ten fingers and ten toes, and then counted them again. And again.

“She’s beautiful,” he whispered, and felt Alex’s hand reach up and grasp his own. 

“She’s perfect.” Alex sniffed and Matt saw that she was crying again. 

“Absolutely perfect,” he mumbled into Alex’s hair, tears welling in his own eyes. This was his baby girl, his daughter. This little figure behind glass was part of him. He was her father. And Alex was her mother. 

Of all the times he had pictured himself as a father, he’d never imagined it would feel like this. So right, so perfect, as if a piece of him had been missing his entire life and it was just now being placed within his soul. He hadn’t known he could feel this much love, this much joy. He’d thought his heart would explode the day he married Alex, but he’d been so wrong. He hadn’t thought he was even capable of feeling love like he did now, hadn’t known this kind of love even existed. His heart physically hurt and God, he didn’t deserve any of this. He was the luckiest man in the world. In the universe. Ever.

Matt looked down at Alex in disbelief. She had made this tiny person. They had made this tiny person.

Alex reached her hands back and up around his neck, pulling his face down clumsily to hers. “I am so proud of you, Kingston,” he whispered, heart soaring as he placed a kiss to her forehead. She pulled his mouth down to hers and kissed him firmly, her hands twisting up into his hair. 

“I love you,” she breathed, pushing her forehead against his.

“I love you, too.” Matt crouched down beside her wheelchair and took her hand in his, pulling it to his lips. 

They watched their baby silently, both of their eyes tracking her stomach as she breathed in and out, in and out. Alex placed her hand to the glass again, and Matt covered it with his own.

“Anneliese.”

Alex had said it so softly that Matt wasn’t sure he’d heard her correctly. “What?”

She turned her head and looked at him, love and tenderness flooding her eyes as she tracked her fingers down his chest, spreading her hand out and resting it directly over his heart before moving to squeeze his shoulder. “I think we should call her Anneliese.”

Matt stared, wide eyed, as Alex bit her lip. “I know it’s not on the list of names we were thinking, but I don’t know. Just sitting here, seeing her for the first time, I think it fits—“

“It’s perfect,” he breathed, his hand wrapping around the back of her neck as he kissed her gently. “It’s absolutely perfect. Just like her.” Matt pulled his head back and saw Alex chewing on her lip, tears slipping out of the corners of her eyes. He wrapped and arm around her shoulders and tugged her lightly towards him, placing a kiss into her hair as she rested her head on his shoulder. 

They sat and watched the small form in the cot breathe in and out, in and out, as her little arms spammed occasionally and her feet kicked the air. She was a beautiful, perfect little miracle. Their beautiful, perfect little miracle. 

Anneliese.

 

* * *


	6. Chapter 6

“Leesie!”

Salome giggled as Anneliese shoved a fistful of Cheerios into her sister’s face. Salome wiped them off her cheek dramatically and waggled her fingers at her baby sister. Anneliese giggled as her hand flew to the side, knocking her sippy off of the highchair and sending it rolling across the floor. Salome was quick to pick it up, walking over to the sink and rinsing the top off before giving it back to her little sister carefully. She gave Matt a small smile as she squeezed by him.

“Well at least we know that someone inherited your unparalleled clumsiness…” Karen’s voice filled Matt’s ear and he turned on her, finger jabbing at her chest playfully.

“Oi! Someday you two are gonna have a little ginge running around your house so I don’t want to hear it! She’s perfect.”

“Hard to believe it’s already been a year,” Arthur cut in, walking over and wrapping an arm around Karen’s shoulders. Matt’s eye caught on something bright and he watched the silver band on Arthur’s ring finger as Karen twined her hand with his. Matt smiled to himself and stared at his shoes.

“What are you grinning at?” Alex chirped from behind him, her arms snaking around his waist. She rested her chin on his shoulder as Matt placed a kiss to her temple.

“Nothing, it’s just…”

Matt scanned the room - Arthur and Karen whispering quietly between themselves, his father talking with Anthony as his mother and Margarethe pinched and prodded his baby girl. Salome standing by, shrieking and giggling as Laura came up behind her and grabbed at her sides.

“…Time flies so fast, doesn’t it?”

Alex hummed in agreement as he pulled her around to his side, placing his hand on the small of her back and pressing her closer. “It feels like just yesterday we were sitting in that hospital, wondering if she would make it… Now look at her.” Matt nodded to their baby as Alex smiled into his shoulder and he buried his nose in her hair.

“She’s absolutely wonderful,” Alex whispered, sighing into him.

“I’m sorry your sisters couldn’t be here…” Matt mumbled, pulling back to look her in the eye.

“It’s fine, darling. We’ll see them next week.” She smiled and looked over at Anneliese. “I think they’ll be quite happy to see her.”

“So they will,” Matt replied, looking around the room and taking in this picture of his wonderful family. He didn’t know how on earth he deserved the life he’d been given, but he would take it. All of it. Without any complaint, because it was more than he ever could’ve asked for.

Alex took a deep breath against him and patted his chest lightly. “I think it’s time for cake,” she exclaimed, pushing off of his side and pulling the small, pink frosted dessert off of the counter. Matt grabbed a white candle from the drawer beside the sink, pushing it into the icing and lighting it with a match.

“The pink icing was a nice touch.”

Alex smiled up at Matt as she pulled the cake away from him, balancing it in one hand. “You sure it’s not too… ‘cliché’?”

He smirked at her and she shoved at his arm with her free hand.

“Oh, shut up.”

Alex readjusted the cake in her hands and slid around the counter.

The room fell silent as Alex walked toward their little girl. Anneliese’s eyes lit up as she saw the bright flame of the candle, and her arms flapped at her sides as she squealed in delight. Alex knelt by the highchair and placed the small cake in front of their baby, kissing the top of her head softly.

Matt watched as Laura pulled out her mobile and started taking pictures. Chuckling, he joined in as everyone started singing and Anneliese poked at the pink cake. Her eyes lit up as she stared at the candle, Alex rubbing small circles on her back. Alex looked over at Matt and smiled as her lips moved to the words “Happy Birthday, dear Anneliese”, the apples of her cheeks flushing with joy. He glanced at his daughter, her cheeks flushed exactly like her mother’s as her hands dove into the cake. His eyes widened and Alex looked back at the baby, gasping before throwing her head back and laughing.

She was so beautiful. They both were. His whole family was. He was the luckiest man in the world and couldn’t have wanted for anything else. His life was perfect.

Matt blinked, determined to capture this moment and remember it forever, and Alex smiled at him as she blew out the candle.

“Happy Birthday to you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is. The end :) Thank you all so much for reading and sticking with this story through *cough* long breaks. You have no idea how much it means to me! I hope that you enjoyed it! As always, comments and kudos absolutely make my day! Once again, thank you so much for reading. I love you all!
> 
> Until next time... xx


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